It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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