Have you finally orgasmed yet?
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
They have beer where we have blood.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
