Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Randomize
