My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
