let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
