My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
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I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
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Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
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