i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
