Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
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