you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
Randomize