i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
