Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
