Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
15 Things That Could NEVER Happen Anywhere But the South
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
15 Times “Flight of the Conchords” Made You Feel Better About Being a Twenty-Something
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche