Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
