Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.