butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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