Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
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