Kiss
Puke
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
