Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
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