i barfeds in our rink
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
