I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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