Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
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