is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
