Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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