i will never coherently bang her
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize