I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
