That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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