I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.