Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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