Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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