i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
