Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize