turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Randomize
