The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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