Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
