He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
