Define "chronic" masturbator.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
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