Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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