what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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