Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
