I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize