Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
