WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Randomize
