Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
