it hurts more in the daytime
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
