Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
that's an acceptable place to lick
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
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