Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
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Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
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We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
we're so committed to being not committed
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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