it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Randomize
