i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
