I just threw up on my dentist
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
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