So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Randomize
