..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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