I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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